Episode 122: Making the Holidays Meaningful - Keep the Joy and Ditch the Guilt

Hello, hi! Are you feeling overwhelmed by all the expectations of the holiday season? In this episode, we’re tackling the “holiday guilt” that so many moms and women feel this time of year—guilt about not doing enough, spending too much, or skipping traditions. Together, we’ll explore how to tell the difference between decisions you need to let go of and opportunities to align with what truly matters. By the end of this episode, we'll have completed an exercise to help you map out a holiday season that feels joyful, intentional, and guilt-free.

 

Episode Summary

• Check in: I share that while everything is going well on paper, I’ve been struggling with a flare-up of my anxiety. My empathy has been in overdrive with a lot of things I’m witnessing online or in the news. I’m trying to remember that I’ve learned a lot over the last 5 years managing my health and wellness, but that doesn’t mean that I’m “cured” or that I’ll never struggle
• Today’s episode is about normalinzing guilt and allowing guilt to run the show to meet the needs of others over the holiday season.
• We accept our guild over the holiday because it’s kind of motivating! It gets us doing some things that maybe feel like a lot of extra for OR it helps us make decisions, and the holidays are a time when decisions are in overdrive and add to our exhaustion.
• I discuss a few areas of the holidays where you might be experiencing guilt: 

1. Holiday Planning and preparation
2. Gifts
3. Family and Community events and expectations
4. Parenting and Kids
5. Holiday Burnout

 

Medium Effort

• Reflect on what always matters to you all year round and ask yourself “does that change for the holidays?”
• Ask yourself, “what will make me feel aligned with my values this holiday instead of managing guilt and making sure I’m productive?”
• Make a list of all the things that might make you feel guilty this holiday season, and sort them into two categories: 1. Move on (this is just a decision, and not specific to your values) and 2. Show Up (something is meaningful for you and should be prioritized)

Mindful Fun: Make a Holiday Map

• On your own or with your spouse/kids/friends/ write out three priorities for your holiday (these will come from the show up column)
• Around these priorities list any and all activities that you might do that you can either plan for or decide if the opportunity comes up you will pursue. 
• Draw a large circle around those things and write in “Where I show up this holiday season” on the top of the circle
• Below the circle, brainstorm the non-priorities *(usually the opposite of whatever already matters to you)
• Draw a box around this list and title it “Where I move on this holiday season.”
• Now that you have a Holiday Map, notice when things show up that were unexpected and you can evaluate those things against the map, knowing you’ve already decided where to show up and where to move on WITHOUT the guilt.
• Our guilt is a habit, and it will take practice to remind yourself that it’s not about normalizing guilt, it’s about making decisions and having conviction about those decisions as you move through the season. 
• This might not feel smooth this year but with practice maybe in the future it will be easy to experience the holidays without guilt!

Other Episodes you might like:

Episode 119: 9 Small Things I’m No Longer Feeling Guilty About

Episode 120: 9 Small Things My Husband Never Feels Guilty About with guest Handsome Face

Episode 121: Mindful Content Creators and the Quest to Curate a Perfect Childhood with guest Stephanie Cunningham

Medium Lady Reads Episode 31- Your Reading Slump is Totally Normal

Connect with Erin:

• Instagram: @medium.lady
• Email: mediumladytalks@gmail.com 
• Explore more book-related content on "Medium Lady Reads." - link to Spotify
• Instagram: @mediumladyreads
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