Medium Lady Talks: Burnout Recovery for Millennials and Mothers

Episode 161: Who Knew Quitting My Phone Would Be This Hard! Here's What No One Tells you...

Cutting back your screen time should feel peaceful… right?Except when you actually try it, quitting your phone feels uncomfortable, emotional, and surprisingly hard.
In Episode 161, part of Phone Free Fall, I’m sharing a deeply honest four-to-six-week check-in on what it’s really like to change your relationship with your phone — including the withdrawal phase no one talks about, the “brain bargaining” that happens in the early weeks, and the surprising shifts that happen when your nervous system stops drinking from the firehose of five-second dopamine hits.
If you’ve ever wondered why scrolling feels rewarding, why boredom feels unbearable, or why your screen time spikes right when you’re trying to quit, this episode unpacks all of that with compassion, context, and real tools.
Together we explore:
✔️ What I actually changed (spoiler: nothing dramatic)✔️ The gap you have to fill when the phone goes down✔️ Why the first 2–3 weeks feel so uncomfortable✔️ The neuroscience of dopamine withdrawal✔️ How scrolling delivers stimulation, not satisfaction✔️ Why screen time may rise before it falls✔️ How creativity starts to re-inflate when input slows down✔️ The moments of “micro-boredom” that tug you back to your phone✔️ What I’m paying attention to next — including the emotional load–scrolling boomerang effect
If you’re trying to scroll less and live more, this episode will help you feel less alone in the messy middle — and more confident about what’s actually happening in your brain, your body, and your habits.
🧠 In This Episode, You’ll Learn:
Why your brain negotiates, bargains, and resists when you put your phone away
Why real life feels slow after constant online stimulation
How to interpret boredom as data instead of failure
How your saved folders reveal what you’re craving in real life
Why the “invisible load” peaks at the same time as screen time
How creativity grows when consumption shrinks
The tiny daily patterns (6am scroll, waiting-in-line scroll, bedtime scroll) worth noticing
How to reset without moralizing or self-judgment
🔎 SEO Keywords
phone addiction, digital detox, reduce screen time, dopamine detox, scrolling addiction, mindful phone use, overstimulation in women, burnout recovery, mental load and phone use, how to stop doomscrolling, motherhood and mental health, creative rest, digital wellbeing, phone-free tips
💬 Reflection Questions for Listeners
Use these prompts to explore your own phone-free journey:
When in your day are you most likely to reach for your phone?
What emotion usually triggers the scroll — boredom? overwhelm? avoidance?
What “quick hits” does your brain miss most?
What real-life activities give you slow-drip dopamine?
What creative urges are hiding behind your saved folders?
When you scroll “to rest,” does it actually feel restful afterwards?
How does your mood shift before, during, and after scrolling?
What small moment could you reclaim (morning routine, commute, transitions)?
Are you doing Phone Free Fall with me?Share your check-in over at @medium.lady or send me a DM — I love hearing your stories, questions, and aha moments.
And if today’s episode helped you feel seen, scroll a little less, or breathe a little deeper, make sure you share this episode with a friend you care about, so we can build a big community of people stepping back from this black box of doom. 

Episode 160: From Caregiver to Creator: The Restorative Power of Art with guest Jaime Townzen

In this episode of Medium Lady Talks, Erin sits down with watercolor artist and author Jaime Townzen for a heartfelt conversation about the shift from caregiving to creativity — and how making art became her most powerful source of rest.
Jaime shares her story of moving through years of intense caregiving, grief, and the emotional load of motherhood, and how a simple watercolor tutorial in 2020 opened the door to calm, grounding, and a renewed sense of self. Together, Erin and Jaime explore what it means to rest creatively, how small creative acts can quiet anxiety, and why giving ourselves 15 minutes with no “deliverable” can change our whole nervous system.
They also dig into the guilt so many women feel when trying to rest, the transition from parenting young kids to supporting aging loved ones, and how to spend less time on your phone by choosing slower, more intentional hobbies.
If you’ve ever said, “I wish I could paint,” or “I wish I had time to write,” this episode will meet you right where you are — and gently nudge you toward the creative practices your future self will thank you for.
Together, Erin and Jaime talk about:
How making art can regulate your nervous system
Why creative hobbies matter even if no one ever sees them
The guilt women feel when trying to rest
Navigating the shift from raising kids to caring for elders
Using creativity to spend less time on your phone
Letting go of perfectionism and embracing “just a piece of paper”
How small creative rituals can reconnect you to your identity
Key Takeaways
Creative rest doesn’t require talent — it requires time and permission.
Your first step isn’t “becoming an artist.” It’s sitting down.
A 15-minute hobby with no deliverable can completely shift your internal state.
Caring for others doesn’t mean losing yourself. Boundaries create wholeness.
Mindful phone use is tiring — and that’s why it reduces screen time naturally.
🔗 Resources & Mentions
Jaime Townzen’s Art & Writing
Absorbed by Jaime Townzen available wherever you love to buy books and at your public library (my library had a digital copy on Hoopla!)
Sarah Cray Watercolor tutorials 
Connect with Erin:
Instagram: @medium.lady
Patreon: www.patreon.com/mediumlady 
Email: mediumladytalks@gmail.com 
Explore more book-related content on "Medium Lady Reads." - link to Spotify
Instagram: @mediumladyreads
 

Episode 159: Put Your Phone in Landline Mode: A New Way to Rest with guest Kassadi Gabriel

What if your phone could stop following you around?
In Episode 159 of Medium Lady Talks, Erin Vandeven sits down with creator and stay-at-home mom Kassadi Gabriel—the mind behind the viral idea of “landline mode.” Together they unpack how simple technology boundaries can restore your patience, creativity, and peace of mind in a culture addicted to constant connection.
They talk about:
What “landline mode” really is and how to try it yourself
Why boundaries around your phone help you like yourself more
How overstimulation and mental load show up in motherhood
The myth of “consistency” as the new hustle culture
How curiosity (not perfection) brings hobbies and creativity back to life
This episode is part of Erin’s Phone Free Fall series—a season-long experiment in reclaiming attention, slowing down, and noticing what real rest feels like.
Mentioned in this episode:
Kassadi Gabriel on TikTok @kassadig
Kassadi Gabriel on Instagram @kassadigabriel
Brick affiliate link ($10 off via this link)
Medium Lady Talks Episode 156 Phone Free Fall
If you’ve been craving fewer notifications and more presence, this conversation will help you find calm in a world that won’t stop pinging.
Keywords: phone boundaries, digital wellness, motherhood, mindful living, overstimulation, rest, burnout, attention span, social media use, phone free fall, Medium Lady Talks

Episode 158 The Fire and the Quiet: Poetry, Grief, and Real Rest with Anna Jollymore

In this episode of Medium Lady Talks, Erin sits down with poet, grief coach, and tarot reader Anna Jollymore to explore what it means to slow down, feel deeply, and create from the fire within.
Anna is the author of Words for Becoming, a stunning debut collection that gazes unflinchingly at the shadow side of personal transformation. Together, Erin and Anna unpack how poetry can help us process grief, rest our overworked minds, and reconnect with our inner voice in a world that rewards constant doing.
This conversation continues Erin’s Phone Free Fall series, inviting listeners to put down their phones and pick up something slower, quieter, and infinitely more real — reflection, creativity, and the sacred art of becoming.
Key Topics Discussed
How poetry makes space for emotions we usually rush past
Using writing and creativity as tools for grief and transformation
What happens when we stop numbing uncertainty with our phones
The connection between metaphor, mindfulness, and real rest
How poetry and tarot can ground us in embodied self-awareness
The beauty of sincerity, authenticity, and imperfection in creative work
Guest Bio
Anna Jollymore (she/they) is a Midwestern-based author, teacher, grief expert, and professional tarot reader. Her debut poetry collection, Words for Becoming, explores the sacred tension between loss and renewal — and the ways grief can shape us into something new. Anna is also a certified Grief Recovery Method coach and facilitator who helps others make meaning through creative and spiritual practice.
📖 Words for Becoming is available now on Bookshop.org and Amazon.📱 Follow Anna on Instagram at @thepoetannajollymore.
 
Takeaway for Listeners
If you’ve been feeling burned out, overstimulated, or disconnected from your creative side, this episode invites you back to yourself. Through poetry, journaling, and mindful stillness, you can find small, steady ways to rest — not by escaping your life, but by being more fully present in it.
Resources Mentioned
Words for Becoming by Anna Jollymore
The Grief Recovery Method
Phone Free Fall series on Medium Lady Talks
Medium Lady Reads — the sister podcast for book lovers and mindful readers
Call to Action
If this episode spoke to you, share it with a friend who’s been craving real rest or a creative spark.Subscribe to Medium Lady Talks wherever you listen, and leave a review to help more listeners find the show.
Join Erin’s community at mediumladycommunity.com Follow Erin on Instagram: @medium.lady

[REPOST] Episode 109: Medium Lady Unfiltered - Three Truths About Motherhood Content on TikTok and Instagram

In an effort to continue to rest while also hosting a podcast, I'm reposting an episode from the archives. This episode of Medium Lady Talks originally aired on July 11, 2024. Enjoy and new episodes will air next Monday!
_________
Hello, hi! Today’s episode is a first for the show: Medium Lady Rants? After being influenced by a few videos critiquing BookTok and the Beauty Influencer space it occurred to me that some of the problems in those spaces also exist in the motherhood content space. And I have a lot of thoughts about it! This episode is designed to give you some healthy skepticism about short form content that targets mothers, so you can avoid the shame and blame that can sometimes be triggered after a scroll session.
Episode Summary
Why do moms seek this kind of content in the first place? And why can it be harmful?
While we don’t need to call out or “cancel” any particular creator there are themes behind some of the content that is useful to pay attention to
I’ll talk about why I resisted embracing the “Mom” niche for so long
The “machine” of social media is not invested in our wellness at all - even if creators are doing their best to create intentional content
Ultimately, motherhood content on social media feels like it’s serving a need - if we’re aware of what those needs are we can be more mindful as we consume short form content. 
It’s crucial to remember that virality will always come before your mental health - and I’ll explain more about why this is the case.
What is rage baiting? And how does it work when it comes to short form content for mothers?
Remember your focus and attention is currency: creators will use your insecurities as the entry point to gain more of that currency as collateral you might find yourself being preyed upon for engagement.
I routinely reflect on the struggle I’ve experienced as a content creator to dabble with and mess around in some of the spaces that provide a straighter path to growth and virality and the cost of that would be my personal desire to help people and leave my audience better than when they found me.
Awareness of how this content can leave you in a shame and blame spiral is only good if it compels you to take ACTION - I’ll share my suggestions for how you can bring mindfulness and digital habits to your consumption of short form content (it’s easy I promise)
 
Other Episodes you might like:
Episode 107: From Anxiety to Action - How to reclaim your mental headspace with guest and coach Madeline Farquharson
Episode 108: From Self-Neglect to Self-Care - Prioritizing your Needs with guest and coach Madeline Farquarson
Other Resources mentioned:
The Opal App
Connect with Erin:
Instagram: @medium.lady
Email: mediumladytalks@gmail.com 
Explore more book-related content on "Medium Lady Reads." - link to Spotify
Instagram: @mediumladyreads

Episode 157: The Scroll Reflex: Finding Sensory Rest in a Noisy World

Series: Phone Free Fall – Scroll Less. Live More.
Keywords: phone addiction, sensory rest, digital wellness, mindfulness, motherhood burnout, nervous-system regulation, overstimulation, real rest, millennial moms, self-care
Summary :In Episode 157 of Medium Lady Talks, host Erin Vandeven takes listeners deeper into the Phone Free Fall series—exploring why so many of us instinctively reach for our phones and how that reflex keeps us from real rest.
Building on last week’s episode Welcome to Phone Free Fall, Erin reveals that scrolling isn’t a failure of willpower—it’s a learned nervous-system shortcut. Our brains use screens to numb when we’re overstimulated and to spark when we’re bored. The result? We rarely let our senses slow down long enough to truly feel alive.
This episode introduces sensory rest, the practice of noticing how your body feels when you stop flooding it with input. Erin shares her own experiments with putting down earbuds, sipping coffee in silence, and noticing textures, sounds, and smells as everyday acts of recovery. Drawing on listener poll insights—where nearly half admitted they scroll to “escape and numb”—she explores how to replace that quick dopamine hit with micro-joys that actually restore energy and connection.
You’ll walk away with:✨ A new understanding of the scroll reflex and how to retrain it🧘‍♀️ A simple “one scroll → one sensory moment” experiment to try this week🪞 Three reflection prompts to help you notice when and why you scroll🌿 Ideas for small sensory rituals that make you feel grounded and alive
Because the goal isn’t to delete your apps—it’s to bring quiet, creativity, and curiosity back into your real life.
🎧 Listen now to Medium Lady Talks – Episode 157: The Scroll Reflex & the Art of Sensory Rest💬 Experiment: Replace one scroll moment with one sensory moment.
 
 
The series starts here!
 
Don’t forget to subscribe! If this episode resonates, share it with a friend or leave a review—it helps others find the show!
 
Connect with Erin:
Instagram: @medium.lady
Patreon: www.patreon.com/mediumlady 
Email: mediumladytalks@gmail.com 
Explore more book-related content on "Medium Lady Reads." - link to Spotify
Instagram: @mediumladyreads
#PhoneFreeFall #MediumLadyTalks #SensoryRest #DigitalWellness #ScrollLessLiveMore #MindfulLiving #BurnoutRecovery #RestRevolution #MillennialMoms #SelfCareJourney

Episode 156: Welcome to Phone Free Fall

🪂 Episode 156 — Welcome to Phone Free Fall
Keywords: phone addiction, digital wellness, social media burnout, motherhood and mental health, mindful living, rest, overstimulation, self-care, millennial mothers
Summary :In the first episode of her new series Phone Free Fall, host Erin Vandeven explores the surprising truth behind her biggest barrier to real rest — her phone. Building on the success of The Summer of Real Rest, Erin opens up about how social media, overstimulation, and invisible labor keep so many millennial women from feeling truly restored.
Drawing on new research from Her Index 2025 and JAMA Internal Medicine, Erin connects the dots between burnout, digital clutter, and the steep decline in mothers’ mental health. She offers honest reflections on the addictive pull of social media, the false sense of productivity our screens provide, and what happens when we trade real connection for the scroll.
This episode invites listeners to join Erin in a gentle experiment: silence your notifications for 24 hours and notice how your attention shifts. You’ll learn how awareness — not guilt — can help you reclaim mental space, sensory rest, and creativity.
If you’ve ever thought, “I know social media is bad for me, but all my friends are in there,” this episode is your invitation to scroll less and live more.
Listen to discover:
Why your phone might be the biggest barrier to rest
How digital clutter mirrors emotional clutter
The connection between social media use and women’s declining mental health
Three reflection prompts to help you notice your phone habits
A realistic way to start your own Phone Free Fall
🧡 If this episode resonates with you:
Share it with a friend who needs a little extra encouragement
Leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify—it helps more than you know
DM me on Instagram @medium.lady or tag your favorite quote from the episode
Subscribe for more real talk about building a life you love—one medium-effort step at a time
Looking for more support? Access exclusive content and mindful living tools on Patreon. 
 
Don’t forget to subscribe! If this episode resonates, share it with a friend or leave a review—it helps others find the show!
Other Related Episodes (for your enjoyment):
Ep 144: Sacred Rest & Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith
Ep 145: Are You Proud of Being Tired?
Ep 146: When My Eye Stops Twitching
Ep 147: The Toxic To-Do List
 
Medium Lady Reads Episode 43 - Our Best Recommendations for Your Summer Reading Pile
 
Connect with Erin:
Instagram: @medium.lady
Patreon: www.patreon.com/mediumlady 
Email: mediumladytalks@gmail.com 
Explore more book-related content on "Medium Lady Reads." - link to Spotify
Instagram: @mediumladyreads
#PhoneFreeFall #MediumLadyTalks #DigitalWellness #MindfulLiving #SocialMediaDetox #RestRevolution #MillennialMoms #BurnoutRecovery #ScrollLessLiveMore

Episode 155: Start Small When You Don't Know How to REst

Have you ever thought, “I don’t even know what would be restorative right now”? You’re not alone. In fact, nearly 60% of women report spending no time on self-care most days, leaving them depleted and unsure how to fill their own tank.
In this episode 155 of Medium Lady Talks, I share a practical way to bridge the gap between knowing you’re exhausted and actually choosing something restorative. Building on Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith’s 7 Types of Rest, I introduce my simplified BEMS framework, four buckets you can reach for when you’re too tired to think clearly:
Body (hydrate, stretch, nap, walk)
Emotions (cry, laugh, connect with someone safe)
Mind (phone break, music, doodle, brain dump)
Senses (dim the lights, light a candle, step outside)
You’ll hear why decision fatigue makes it so hard to choose rest, what the latest research tells us about the decline in maternal mental health, and how invisible labor and overstimulation drain us daily. (For reference, here’s the JAMA study I mention: Trends and Disparities in Maternal Self-Reported Mental and Physical Health, 2016–2023).
If you’ve been feeling flat, frazzled, or unsure how to restore yourself, this episode will give you a gentle place to start — one tiny action at a time.
✨ Bonus: Patreon subscribers can download the printable Restorative Cheat Sheet that turns this framework into an easy everyday tool - will be Published  on Tuesday Sept 30
 
🧡 If this episode resonates with you:
Share it with a friend who needs a little extra encouragement
Leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify—it helps more than you know
DM me on Instagram @medium.lady or tag your favorite quote from the episode
Subscribe for more real talk about building a life you love—one medium-effort step at a time
Looking for more support? Access exclusive content and mindful living tools on Patreon. 
Join the conversation! Share one need you're naming today and tag @medium.lady on Instagram.
The series starts here!
 
Don’t forget to subscribe! If this episode resonates, share it with a friend or leave a review—it helps others find the show!
Other Related Episodes (for your enjoyment):
Ep 144: Sacred Rest & Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith
Ep 145: Are You Proud of Being Tired?
Ep 146: When My Eye Stops Twitching
Ep 147: The Toxic To-Do List
Medium Lady Reads Episode 43 - Our Best Recommendations for Your Summer Reading Pile
 
Connect with Erin:
Instagram: @medium.lady
Patreon: www.patreon.com/mediumlady 
Email: mediumladytalks@gmail.com 
Explore more book-related content on "Medium Lady Reads." - link to Spotify
Instagram: @mediumladyreads

Episode 154: The Restful Reset: Using the Fall Equinox to Welcome What's Next

Feeling the shift from summer to fall? This episode of Medium Lady Talks guides you through my How to Start a New Month workbook — a simple, cozy ritual for reflection, balance, and self-care. Grab your free copy on Patreon and join me in creating a restful reset for what’s next.
The Fall Equinox is the perfect reminder that transitions are worth noticing. In episode 154 of Medium Lady Talks, I’m inviting you to pause, reflect, and reset as we move from the brightness of summer into the slower rhythm of fall. Whether you’re listening on the equinox or months later, this episode will guide you through my How to Start a New Month workbook — a gentle framework for welcoming change with more rest and less hustle.
Together, we’ll explore:
How to reflect on what you already know about the coming season
What lessons and resilience you can carry forward from summer
How to cultivate a cozy, sensory vibe for fall that feels uniquely yours
Simple ways to make small, meaningful plans that honor your energy
✨ Download the free workbook here: How to Start a New Month PDF
If you’re feeling the weight of invisible labor or resisting the darker days ahead, this episode is your invitation to pause, notice, and claim your own restful reset. The equinox may only last a day, but the practice of balance and reflection can carry you through the whole season.
~~~
💬 Let Erin know what “real rest” means to you over on Instagram @medium.lady—and share this episode with the friend who’s doing everything “right” and still wondering why she’s so tired.
 
This episode marks the end of our “Summer of Real Rest” series a time to call ourselves in to a true commitment to the soft work of feeling better one step at a time. 
🧡 If this episode resonates with you:
Share it with a friend who needs a little extra encouragement
Leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify—it helps more than you know
DM me on Instagram @medium.lady or tag your favorite quote from the episode
Subscribe for more real talk about building a life you love—one medium-effort step at a time
Looking for more support? Access exclusive content and mindful living tools on Patreon. 
Join the conversation! Share one need you're naming today and tag @medium.lady on Instagram.
The series starts here!
 
Don’t forget to subscribe! If this episode resonates, share it with a friend or leave a review—it helps others find the show!
Other Related Episodes (for your enjoyment):
 
Ep 144: Sacred Rest & Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith
Ep 145: Are You Proud of Being Tired?
Ep 146: When My Eye Stops Twitching
Ep 147: The Toxic To-Do List
 
Medium Lady Reads Episode 43 - Our Best Recommendations for Your Summer Reading Pile
 
Connect with Erin:
Instagram: @medium.lady
Patreon: www.patreon.com/mediumlady 
Email: mediumladytalks@gmail.com 
Explore more book-related content on "Medium Lady Reads." - link to Spotify
Instagram: @mediumladyreads
 

Episode 153: What Can You Put Down (For Now)?

What if the reason you feel so depleted isn’t that you’re not trying hard enough… but that you’re carrying too much?
In episode 153 of Medium Lady Talks, Erin explores the radical question: What can you put down, for now? As we close out the Summer of Real Rest series and transition toward fall, Erin guides you through a playful self-assessment quiz to help you identify the weight you’ve been carrying — and what you can finally release.
✨ In this episode, you’ll learn:
Why so many women admit to spending 0% of their day on self-care (Her Index survey)
How grind culture convinces us that fatigue = worthiness
Why decision fatigue can feel more comfortable than choosing to rest
The four biggest energy drains: productivity as morality, over-functioning in relationships, white-knuckle mental control, and perfectionism
A fun 3-question quiz to help you discover what you can put down this season
💬 Quotes from the episode:
“Something has to give for you to get that time for yourself. The problem we’re coming from is a zero percent rest rate.”
“You don’t have to burn it all down — but you can’t keep carrying everything.”
“Rest is not quitting. It’s about choosing the margin of space you need to be you.”
This episode is a gentle but firm reminder: rest doesn’t come from doing more. It comes from doing less — and choosing what to put down.
 
This episode is part of our “Summer of Real Rest” series—time to call ourselves in to a true commitment to the soft work of feeling better one step at a time. 
 
🧡 If this episode resonates with you:
Share it with a friend who needs a little extra encouragement
Leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify—it helps more than you know
DM me on Instagram @medium.lady or tag your favorite quote from the episode
Subscribe for more real talk about building a life you love—one medium-effort step at a time
Looking for more support? Access exclusive content and mindful living tools on Patreon. 
Join the conversation! Share one need you're naming today and tag @medium.lady on Instagram.
The series starts here!
 
Don’t forget to subscribe! If this episode resonates, share it with a friend or leave a review—it helps others find the show!
Other Related Episodes (for your enjoyment):
Ep 144: Sacred Rest & Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith
Ep 145: Are You Proud of Being Tired?
Ep 146: When My Eye Stops Twitching
Ep 147: The Toxic To-Do List
 
Medium Lady Reads Episode 43 - Our Best Recommendations for Your Summer Reading Pile
 
Connect with Erin:
Instagram: @medium.lady
Patreon: www.patreon.com/mediumlady 
Email: mediumladytalks@gmail.com 
Explore more book-related content on "Medium Lady Reads." - link to Spotify
Instagram: @mediumladyreads
 
 
#mediumladytalks #summerofrealrest #restrevolution #burnoutrecovery #selfcareforwomen #mentalrest #decisionfatigue #boundariesarebeautiful #softwork #perfectionismrecovery